BullScanner - A New Product To Prevent BS In Business

For years I have given students in my classes at Georgetown one basic rule for writing assignments: there is no minimum word count. Why? Because the more words you use, the more likely it is that many of them will be meaningless corporate-speak. Today I'm excited to share that I'm part of the team behind a product that the business world has desperately needed for years now: The Bullscanner. The BullScanner finds and eliminates BS from business documents. How does it work? Just press one button to scan any document. The BullScanner will digitize the document and also use dynamic linguistic scaling to analyze the language used. The system then automatically calculates a single Linguistic Relativity Score (LRS) for every sentence. An LRS score of ten or more is considered good. Anything below a ten will result in a document being tagged as "BS." Based on the LRS Score, the Bullscanner will either: 1. Scan the document to PDF and automatically save to email. 2. Use a built in Superradiant Nitrogen Laser to disintegrate the original document and emit a wave based electrical shock via email back to the document creator. The BullScanner will officially hit the shelves in time for holiday season.  Or at least ... it should.* *